Songs for the Deaf: The Drinking Game

Presenting SONGS FOR THE DRUNK, the Queens of the Stone Age drinking game! It's great fun for any number of players, and given that 'alcohol' is one of the many, many narcotics mentioned in Feel Good Hit of the Summer, I'd like to think that QOTSA themselves would approve.

You will need:

• Songs for the Deaf, the seminal 2002 album from Queens of the Stone Age
• A steady supply of your favourite alcoholic beverage
• A half-decent soundsystem that will allow everyone to hear the album properly

The Rules:

Listen to Songs for the Deaf in its entirety and follow these instructions...

1. Take a drink every time there is a radio link before or after a song.


2. Take a drink whenever a four-letter station code (WOMB, KRDL, etc.) is spoken.


3. Take drink for every false ending (that is, when the song appears to have finished, but then comes back again). WARNING: A Song for the Dead has about four of these.


4. Take a drink when the music suddenly gets very loud (as in Six Shooter, You Think I Ain't Worth a Dollar and A Song for the Deaf...and possibly The Sky is Fallin', depending on your threshold for noise).


5. If at least 50% of players agree to do so, everyone (even those players who didn't agree to it) finishes their drinks. You may now skip The Sky is Fallin', which clearly goes on for far too long.


6. Conversely, any player who makes it to the end of The Sky is Fallin' without complaining, attempting to invoke Rule 5, or pointing out that the song goes on for far too long may nominate any other player to take a drink.


7. If, at any time, you think of a meaningful connection between the radio links and the songs they segue into/out of (e.g. all of the radio stations heard before God is in the Radio are of a religious nature), you may state this profound realisation. If you do so, all other players must take a drink.


8. If somebody forgets that A Song for the Deaf isn't the last song on the album and attempts to switch off the stereo before Mosquito Song comes on, that person must finish EVERYONE's drinks.


9. OPTIONAL BONUS RULE (for hardcore drinkers only): Take a drink every time Josh Homme sings the name of the current track.

Additional Notes:

Songs for the Deaf is a road trip album, and as such, this game is best played in a car, preferably en route to a music festival or wild party of some sort. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES should the driver participate in the drinking game at any point.

Once the album has finished, I recommend taking the time to drunkenly argue over which is the best track. Anyone who suggests The Sky is Fallin' is never allowed to play again.